whatwouldfezwear:

the-sarcastic-robot:

if you want to kill someone stab them with an icicle because the icicle will melt and then there will be no murder weapon

Better yet, make like one of my favorite short stories and murder them with big frozen leg of lamb and then cook the lamb. 

Then when the police arrive offer them something to eat and then have the police eat your murder weapon. 

image

I love that story

(Source: katorade27, via fuckyeahloldemort)

debilitati0n:

bettervillains:

life-at-taco-bell:

You would think that teenagers would be the rudest customers when really it’s mostly old, middle-aged people. 

  

The elderly are either adorable or the wrinkly reincarnation of Satan there is no in between

(via albinowatermelon)

(Source: vinesnow, via karineer)

mentalalchemy:

angry90slesbian:

When you’ve had one too many

I laughed too hard at this shit

(Source: weloveshortvideos.com, via kkanadian)

korrakun:

my favorite college experience is when i had a 7am class and the kid next to me literally poured a monster energy drink into his coffee said “i’m going to die” and drank the whole thing

(via dutchster)

deadpool-and-boobies-rule-m8:

thehikerslens:

jaclcfrost:

why do greek gods have to fuck up so much shit god damn just stay on your mountain and eat your fucking ambrosia and leave people alone

and stop having sex with things you are not supposed to have sex with

all looking at you here zeus

(via bandgeek-musicfreak)